Monday, November 27, 2006

What I love about Naija Guys

I think of myself as an equal opportunity dater. My dad is Nigerian, my mum is Greek, I spent my childhood in Nigeria, spent my summers in Greece, lived my adult life in England; four years of those spent in Wales where I went to university. Oh, and I spent a semester in Canada. My point is, I've spent my life experiencing different countries and I've been immersed in lots of different cultures and I'm being totally and completely honest when I say that race isn't an issue in the people I meet, or in guys I like. I've dated English guys, I've dated Nigerian guys, I went out with an Indian guy for four months and my friend and I had the biggest crush on a Japanese guy in one of our classes. Really, truly, neither race nor colour is an issue for me.

Now Nigerian guys get a lot of bad press (and I have to admit I'm responsible for at least some of it!), but I think it's very possible that I'll end up with a Nigerian guy. Maybe it's because I spent my formative years around them, as much as there is that I don't like about Naija guys, there's a lot I’m very attracted to. So in the spirit of looking on the bright side and weighing the positives, let me tell you what I love about Nigerian guys (NGs):

o Their persistence: There's an age old cliché that goes something along the lines of ’nothing worth having is ever easy to get' and nobody takes this to heart quite like our Naija brothers. If a NG decides that he likes you and no one else will do, then you're in for a long (often very fun) ride of numerous phone calls, interesting and varied chat up lines, whispers from mutual friends about how much he likes you and if you're lucky and all of this coincides with that one holiday of love a.k.a Valentines day, then you could really hit the jackpot! The point is, if they see something that they like, they will go for it and there's something to be said for that kind of work ethic. This also goes hand in had with their confidence. There's something extremely attractive about a guy that exudes confidence, it makes me want to find out what it is about him that makes him have such self-belief.

o Their ambition: Leading on from my previous point, I love the way NGs always aim for greatness; okay so their motivation is often great amounts of money and huge houses but what is important is that mediocrity is not an option. Probably the thing I find most attractive in a guy is ambition so this is a pretty big deal to me.

o They're very often great conversationalists. I have spent many a late night wrapped up in conversation with a NG. They also give a damn what is going on with you which is very refreshing in our me, me, me generation.

o They let you know that they like you, and how much. I was being 'toasted' by this guy when I was 14. He was older and very popular but he decided he liked me. Apparently once, before we started talking, he knew I'd be somewhere and even though he didn't have petrol in his car, he bribed a friend into giving him a lift so he could be there. And he'd call me just to tell me good night, even though he was with his boys and no doubt they would rag on him. I was fourteen and a good girl, he knew I wasn't going to do anything with him, he just genuinely liked me. Even now, so many years later, I won't settle for a guy who doesn't treat me well because as far as I'm concerned if someone once thought so much of me that they'd have done anything for me, then I deserve that. He's the standard by which I judge guys by now.

o If they have the means, they can be very generous.

Note: Not all NG possess all the qualities described above, so don't be popping your collar if you don't because I'm not talking about you!

22 comments:

Uzo said...

I am loving this post. I have had awful experiences with Nigerian men but i have also had wonderful experiences. Here's to converting the bad eggs to good ones....

Mari said...

"...don't be popping your collar if you don't because I'm not talking about you!"lol, nice one. Great job on the topic.

Babes, am back from my vacation. I sent you the email address so check it out.

Anonymous said...

That is very correct about Nigerian guys! Ride on, promote the brothers, the ambitious brother, the brother that can hold down the conversation, persistent, eloquent gentleman. Mediocrity is an open to them,which they wouldnt settle for. The optimistic man and perfect gentleman. Tell the ladies of what good qualities the Nigerian man possess.

Ooh, when are you coming back to Canada? Did you like it when you were there and where were you?

Unknown said...

@ naijadude: I was in Victoria and I spent a lot of time there and in Vancouver ... I loved every single second of my time there. I was there for the autumn term of 1992 and have wanted to go back since I left! I loved it and I would really like to settle there! It's an amazing place.

Funmi said...

I enjoyed this piece.....

Anonymous said...

woohoo!! i sooooo agree with your list. there is nothing like a GOOD naija man...

Onada - Fashion and Photography said...

LOL i think you gave naija dude a reason for his head to swell lol but i must admit i agree with you

LondonBuki said...

I kinda agree with some things on the list and I like how you ended it - Note: Not all NG possess all the qualities described above, so don't be popping your collar if you don't because I'm not talking about you!

As always, I like this post :-)

Justme said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...

I didn't know we were this good?

I'll be popping my collar whatever you say...

Justme said...

Naija men.........cant live with 'em.........cant live without them!
You are so on point with the persistence thing!

Thanks for dropping my blog :)

Biodun said...

ha ha, I love the last sentence, I love my naija guys too!

Anonymous said...

lol..u r soooo right about the persistence thing..some of them even do it to the point of irritation, ahn ahn!...but u cant help but love em' sha. Great Ppst!

Favoured Girl said...

Great post! This goes out to the good Naija guys out there. You mentioned two things that I find attractive in a guy: great conversation and bags of confidence. Very important.

NaijaBloke said...

Nice post jere Vickii..feeling the post big time ..

Thatz why a whole lot of gurls from other parts of the world r mowing the Naija brothers up and down.

NaijaBloke said...

Abt the persistent and confidence thingy ..was talking to a friend from the Carrribean and she said the one and main thing that attracts her to Naija guys is their confidence,even if you carry fire on ya head,they will still talk to u and will always be persistent with it ..

Anonymous said...

@LondonBuki.....LOL...I am so popping my collar cos she's got my picture right next to that blog eh!

@vickii...Canada is the shyt eh! -indenial, that is-.Well its a lovely place to visit. And tell LondonBuki say my picture is just right beside that naija guy's qualities eh!!

Anonymous said...

I love the fact that our shared cultures creates a level of understanding that cannot be matched by anyone else.

E.G. - That they know that if they are driving you home late at night and they see barricades on the road, they are sharp enough to know its armed robbers and not stop for anything.

That when they care about you, they are willing to go to extremes to cater to you slightest whim.

Poetic Justice said...

One thing I love about my naija guy is that even when he is sleeping he seems so alive. I mean in his resting when his eyes are closed and he is deep asleep, I can still feel the life seeping from every pore of his body.

God I love him!

Naija men rule: except the crazy, stalker, wife beating, "women's place is in the kitchen" having, bigot, simple minded, "I wanna be jamaican", lack of heritage and faith having, mommies boys.

Anonymous said...

Hi vickii. Very interesting post. I wish I shared your love for NGs. I cannot stand the majority of them and THEY cannot stand me...its all psychologigal perhaps, who knows? My issue with NGs is only one among many others im dealing with.

im trying to change though...your post and a few others about NGs are helping tremendously. I will try and see the positive in NGs and not refer to them as obnoxious lying cheating wankers all the time. Its very unfair to the very few decent ones.

Perhaps one day I might find myself attracted to one?

Thanks for the eye opener darling. Keep 'em coming. XX

Unknown said...

@ Yellow Ibo girl ... Lol the naija guys that know me have heard me say 'I'll never end up with a naija guy' a million times because like you I think a lot of the are ahem, everything you said above. But honestly, they really do have some great traits and it's worth recognising them!

Have you never been out with a nigerian guy?

Discombobulated Diva said...

great post... and as much as I complain about Nigerian Guys, i do love them... they have such great qualities... and once you find the right one, you're set for life...

~DD